Our journey begins with the peaceful
hamlet of... er... Hamleton.. Yeah.. that's right, that's what we'll call it...
"Hamleton". So anyway, fate has conspired to bring a curious group of
individuals together on a sleepy Summer's day to this dreadfully boring and
seemingly uneventful Village where there couldn't possibly be anything more
scarier than a grumpy cow or two and the only thing people do for fun is watch
the green grass grow and the West Winds blow (unless you count "going to
the Woods to look for animal companions and almost getting knocked out by
Satyrs" as fun... dammit Janine >_>).
We have with us the brave Ser Jörgen Lanstalk, faithful knight under Duke Estal of Resilos who is as
courageous as a Lion, as loyal as a Rock and as cheap as a Duck- er.. never
mind that (/ooc cheap as Duck?), where was I ? Ah yes,
the nimble-footed young ranger, Janine a.k.a Anna of
the Whisper-water-falling-down Woods with her uncanny fascination for
befriending beasts and stealing shiny stuff. Among the townsfolk we see the brave
fighter of certain disrepute.. yes that's right... I meant "dis"repute.
You heard me... Mirran "Giant-bane" (/ooc pronounced
side-DM) sharpening his Great Sword and in the taverns we see myself, Elan the
Bard of Evensong, singer, performer, actor-extraordinaire and your faithful
chronicler of this eventful journey.
Now that we have all of that out of the way, what was so
special about this Village, this Town of near "-6
Intelligence-penalty" causing excitement, you ask, dear Reader ? With not
a marketplace or blacksmith in sight and no traders anywhere to be found, with
suspiciously watered-down Ale (I'm looking at you Madame Helga) and Poulet de Provencal that smelled
suspiciously like Troll feces (how do I know what Troll feces smells like...
don't ask) ? Why were our courageous Companions guided by the hands of fate to
meet in this particular place, at this particular time ? Well it's really
simple you see. In this particular Village, there lived an old man named Elrath (his
buddies call him Elarth the "Devourer", Reaper of Souls, Creator of
Succubi, Unnecessarily-mean-to-Cats) who by some chance or mischance happened
to catch the eyes of this particular band of misfits and miscreants and the
rest as they say in Bardic Lore Collage... is Comedy.
They say a picture speaks a thousand words. With that in
mind, here is a little sketch that sums up our next few hours in the quaint
little county of Hamleton (picture courtesy):
(/ooc: This
is what you get for trying to derail the main story-line by the way... Sorry DM
^^") So I burnt the Hut.... Obviously... What's a Bard to do ? Turns
out, that didn't work out too well for us. It was on this day that I learnt
Vampires could turn into bats. And wolves. And could one-shot-kill most
experience-challenged adventurers (/ooc: The politically
correct term for level 1 n00bs like us). Our losses were... severe...
to say the least. In fact, Ol' Jörgen and I ran... er-... I
mean... made an "Expeditious Retreat" to regroup and recover. And
that is how my journey in the Land of Hareshki began: A pissed of Vampire Lord,
a newly abandoned Township and two dead Companions right off the bat. And it wasn't
even half past 10 yet. In memory of my fallen Comrades, I compose the following
ballad so they may ever be immortalized in the magic of song (/ooc Now
new and improved to rhyme better)...
Oh hear the sad tale of the Rogue and the Fighter,
Who knew not any fear, a troll would be brighter...
They broke into an Old Man's Hut,
With that Chaotic action, they sealed their fate Shut...
Turns out, you guessed it, no Old Man was he,
Time and again our heroes were warned to flee...
From the depths emerged Elrath the Devourer,
All our poor adventurers could do was cower...
And in the end there was one who saw,
And lived to tell the tale to all...
Heed this warning all you brave Knights and Champions,
Least you end up like Elan's dead Companions...
And
with that Dear Reader, we come to the end of this chapter. Until next time,
Fare Thee Well and remember, never trust an Old Man who can eat a 5 lb. fish in
one sitting...
